SamGomas Predictions For The Weekend

By SamGoma

Sam-Goma

Tjovitjo! A big congratulation goes to the Southern Kings. Yebo baba, those guys played like true warriors against Snake Whites’ Brumbies this morning and were unlucky not to win. You will return to a proud Port Elizabeth guys, but first go show those retarded Rebels how to use a sjambok.

Eish, this weekend is unusually quiet with only the rugby to look forward to. No F1 racing or interesting gwarra gwarra or soccer. But the Moto GP starts on Sunday and SamGoma likes the bikes.

The Sharks are battling the Crusaders in Durban a bit later. Who-ever wins today will get a major penis expansion so I’ll be making a fresh brew of muti for the Sharks. Those Cape Crusaders have become just too much and even though Die Kwaai Ou Man sorted those things out properly, I don’t want any Crusader fan to be happy this weekend.

The big match tomorrow will be the Cheetahs against the Stormers in Bloem. Mangaung is close by so my comrades will be there to support wena.

This should be a good one majitas. I’m making many offerings for the ancestors to smile upon the Stormers in this derby match because those Cheetahs are on fire. Chisa! It’s time for those Cheetahs to be tamed.

Tomorrow the Delhi Daredevils take on the Rajasthan Royals and the Chennai Super Kings are facing the Mumbai Indians in the IPL. Sho, I’m not going to lie, I don’t have too much knowledge of this Indian cricket. The pitches here in the homelands are terrible. So I threw the bones and they said the Daredevils and the Mumbai Indians will win.

Chris, ama-big-blasta Gayle will also be smacking some balls around for the Royal Challengers Bangalore on Sunday. Jah seems to always smile upon him so don’t bet against his team. Not yet.

If the Moto GP goes according to plan, Jorge Lorenzo will win in the desert. The sands of time will tell.

That’s it for now. I’m making a rabbit stew for Kortbroek and he’s almost last in his own SuperBru pool. Shame baba, fokken shame.

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